" Just a suck?" Whatever you want."She undressed, but left her tongue and bra on. I dont know why, maybe the same reason she asked me to leave on just...a bj. Maybe she subconsciously thought that a bj is not cheating, or getting naked infront of me will qualify this as cheating, I dont know.I havent met many 30year olds, that were inexperienced in oral sex, but she was. I decided to give her a few lessons."Look at me while sucking."So she did. So I came in a little deeper, and she started. I made that mistake twenty years ago, and it cost me my relationship with him. Above all else, I was not about to jeopardize the progress he and I had made tonight restoring some semblance of a relationship. If Greg did not want our relationship to involve any physical intimacies, I could accept that. I left him and went into my bedroom. I left the door slightly ajar. I climbed into bed. I thought about masturbating, but decided against it. The four glasses of wine allowed me to drift off to. I knock on her door, she has one of those little eye holes to see who it is before the door is opened. She must have taken a second to make sure it was me, since she greeted me in lacy lingerie. I’m not sure where she shops that sells lingerie that holds breasts that massive, but she catches me staring. “I see when you are tired you can’t control where your eyes go as well.” The previous day I managed to spend most of my working night staring down her blouse without her noticing. “I’m just glad. Soon enough I found out. I had beenstrangled so hard that there had been damage done to my vocal cords,causing them to no longer be able to properly form sound. I was mute.To make things even worse it soon became clear that I had becomepregnant following the rape. Coming from a deeply religious family andhaving grown up hearing that abortion was wrong I too were indoctrinatedwith this belief. But at the same time I didn't want to carry a child inme. That felt so foreign to me that I wanted to.
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